I think I was more than OK the whole time: I'm in His hands, right?

So many experiences this week because of an infectious piece of flesh in my belly - so many amazing people - so many proofs that people care - so many ways to show that He loves me, that His pain was greater than mine.

Truly blessed, I think.

Flight booked.

NJ here I come!

junglebuttons: i had some fish, some beef, a salad, soup, garlic mashed potatoes, sushi, cake, parfet, and a cookie
Crazybean777: no wonder you're sick
Crazybean777: just kidding...if I would have had that stuff I could have eaten it all
Crazybean777: afterall it would really help go towards my three hundred big ones
junglebuttons: yeah - i didn't realize how much stuff it was until i said it outloud.
Crazybean777: well cookie is a long word
Crazybean777: so it makes it sound more than it really is

I had the most amazingly surreal day on Friday -- and I think it's even sweeter that I'm not going to tell any of you about it (any = the people I haven't really told yet... OK, maybe some of you, individually, but not all of you).

Days like that are like the one moment Nietzsche always talks about.

Kudos to me for remembering how to spell that -- thanks Ali.

Hmm... Funny that New Jersey randomly appears here.

What is your emo band name? by spiralinghalo
Your band name is:	Half Empty Smile
You sound like:	Ani DiFranco
You will be signed to:	Equal Vision Records
Your emo lyrics are:	"New Jersey never felt this lonely before"
Name:
Quiz created with MemeGen!

I'm sitting here at almost 3am on a computer on campus that I'm not supposed to be using; I can't sleep. I've been wondering recently why it is that I go long periods of time (never quite this long) without posting anything but pictures and passing comments, and I'm not sure I know.

I think maybe it's because increasingly, I find it more and more difficult to answer the question "how are you doing?" without getting more specific than the asker wanted, and without being vaguely general, too much so to encompass a real answer to the question. Truth is, I feel vulnerable, rejected, changed, moved, lazy... You get the point I think. Good. Bad. Worse. Great. All at once.

I'm thinking we're not careful enough with each other. I know you'll agree, we've all felt shafted at times. Disregarded. Insulted. Just alltogether unloved. More and more I feel like the line between emotional and physical pain is being smudged in my life; I can't think of a worse pain than rejection or ridicule. Not one thing. Tears from a stubbed toe are so much easier than an endless stream of them from a beaten spirit.

Does that make sense?